It’s back-to-school shopping time! I know it’s scary to hear, but I loooove back-to-school shopping. The pens! The notebooks! The folders! The organizational tools! I’m just salivating. I want to be buried in an office supply store, then I’m going to come back and haunt it so I can write with all the pens in all the journals.
The only drawback to back-to-school shopping is that you have to fight the crowds of kids and stressed out moms. I heard a mom losing it because “you have to have a yellow spiral notebook. It has to be yellow!” Sometimes those school lists are a little silly. In San Antonio, a friend of mine would get so frustrated because of the school’s detailed list of exactly what type, brand, color, size, everything that the child should bring to school. They have to all be the same because we don’t won’t anyone to feel inferior because they couldn’t afford the Pirates of the Caribbean folder. Plus, heaven forbid anyone should show any sense of individuality.
Apparently there’s a lot more to school supply peer pressure than I realized.
I watched Beowulf and Grendel this weekend, too. I didn’t rent it because of some great need for literature and epic poetry. I got it because Gerard Butler and Tony Curran are in it.
And yes, they look great and did a great job. Well, they did as well as they could with what they’d been given. And the scenery is amazing, and I’m sure it was a very difficult movie to make, but it doesn’t matter a flip if it’s boring. And if I want to look at amazing scenery, I can do that on Globe Trekker. SPOILER: I’m going to talk about what happens, so if you haven’t seen it and don’t want to know, then you might want to skip this next part.
It’s not that I found the movie boring, which I did, or that I couldn’t understand half the things they said, which I couldn’t, or that I’m one who thinks that movie adaptations have to be loyal to the text, which I don’t. It’s that this Beowulf is a kind post-modern deconstruction that just drives me batty. It’s been years and years and years since I’ve read Beowulf, but this movie seems to have a pretty contemporary view, while keeping the blood and gore of the violent time.
Grendel isn’t a monster and descendant of Cain who kills and wreaks havoc on the Danes, but rather a misunderstood orphan who saw his father killed, so he kills only those who have hurt him. We still have to kill him, but isn’t it sad that we have to do that?
Hell, Beowulf doesn’t even kill Grendel. He kills himself by cutting his own arm off, rather than Beowulf ripping if off like the mighty man and strong hero he is.
And I don’t remember a witch who had Grendel’s son. And I thought Hrothgar was supposed to be a great king and Beowulf’s mentor and teacher, not some guilty wimp who knows why they are being attacked but won’t confess it to anyone. And I really don’t remember Grendel being referred to as “a fucking troll.”
But, that’s just me. That’s why they don’t ask me to make movies.
Speaking of Tony Curran, he's going to be Pentheus to Alan Cumming's Dionysus in Euripide's The Bacchae for the National Theatre of Scotland. They're opening in Edinburgh on 11 August, running through the 18th, then onto Glasgow and London. I would love to see it!
On second thought, maybe I wouldn't. I blush easily and this is a play that should result in a lot of blushing. It's so . . . well, it's . . . um . . . it's Greek. There's vengeance and blood and gore and debauchery and sexual repression and orgies and cross-dressing and ripping of limbs, and well, you just don't want to piss off a god. If I went, I would only distract the actors because I would be that red glow in the dark.
I would guess they'll be amazing in this. I can't imagine a better Dionysus than Alan Cumming.
Oh well. Maybe they'll tape it and put it on PBS? Yeah, I don't think so either.
Ace of Cakes is back for a new season! I love this show. If you haven’t seen it, it’s a reality-based show on the Food Network featuring Duff, ultra cool cake maker and his talented friends at Charm City Cakes. They make the most amazing cakes. I don’t know how good they taste, but who cares. One of the multi-talented people on that show is Geof. He’s my favorite. He reminds me so much of my good friend in Louisiana, but he writes poetry instead of makes cakes. I always miss him after I watch this show. Here’s one of the amazing cakes they’ve made—the Sutton Hoo cake. Cool, huh?
I had a doctor’s appointment the other day—just a yearly check-up. The doc asked if I have any concerns, and I said yes, I’m having a hard time controlling my anger. I keep losing my temper and then I sulk. I don’t even like to be around me! She just looked at the file and I braced myself for it: “Well, you are in your 40s now.”
Well Hell’s Bells! I know that. So, it’s hormones, huh? How does she know? Maybe it’s a brain tumor. Maybe I’m borderline psychotic/manic depressive. Maybe I’ve developed multiple personalities and I have the “evil Kell” and the “sulky, wimpy Kell.” Maybe it’s not me at all! Maybe it really is everybody else! Maybe I really should be pissed off! *pant pant pant*
I think I need some chocolate. Young’s Double Chocolate Stout should do nicely.
I think I'll do that "blog rating" now. I bet I'm up to an R with this post!