Monday, June 26, 2006

It's Going To Be a Long Week, I'm Afraid

We have good friends coming in this week for a funeral. She was planning to come visit me to check on a house they own here, and we were planning to hit our favorites restaurants and bars and bookstores. Plans have changed a little, but we’ll still hit the Dell (our favorite pub) to have a drink for their friend. And I imagine she and I will stay up all night talking and gabbing, which our husbands just shake their head at. How do we find stuff to talk about for so long? Poor guys. It’s a mystery, I know.

Their friend committed suicide. I have personal experience with this, so I was quick to offer them a place to stay and a place to vent all the anger and guilt that come with this experience. It’s so hard to know what to say, so I usually don’t say anything except, “I’m sorry for your loss.” And I warned her that someone is going to say something really inappropriate and that will really piss her off. It’s inevitable at a funeral.

And that reminded me about a guy I met at the party Friday night who had some real words of wisdom in a drunken lecture. We had gotten on the subject of funerals (I don’t remember how), and he went off about the horrible things that people will say. He told all of us (and Mom, you might want to cover your ears at this point) that if you don’t know what to say, don’t say fuckin’ anything. The rest of lecture went, “Just don’t say anything! Don’t try to fuckin’ elaborate or say something else, just don’t say anything besides, ‘I’m sorry.’ It’s like the fuckin’ birthday cards. Everyone tries to write something so meaningful, but ya know what I write on birthday cards? ‘Happy Fuckin’ Birthday’ that’s what. What else do you need?”

So, my friends and family should be prepared for a new slant on birthday cards from me!

5 comments:

Jay said...

Don't all the great words of wisdom come from someone who has been drinking good wine all night. Maybe I should hit the bottle before posting on my blog. Yeah, I know, it looks like I already do. haha

Betty said...

Cover my ears? Hey, I read Jay's blog. I'm becoming immune to that word. But, I think my friend, Mary Ellen had the vapors when I was showing her his blog and came across it in all caps. I had forgotten it was there. We nearly had to resuscitate her. LOL

F&W said...

It's just a great emphasis word, ya know?

I'm sorry to read about your friend's situation. A death is never easy to deal with...no matter how the circumstances are presented. Good for you for opening your home to them.

Love the bday card idea. I worked with a guy that, no matter what, would always write, "Have a happy birthday in your suit". LOL And it was funny too, until one day he accidentally wrote it in a condolence card. Yeesh. Some people require a lot of supervision.

Kell said...

. . . in your suit" LOL on that one.

saz said...

colorful but wise.