La la love

Happy Valentines Day

Wrap your arms around you as tight as you possibly can. That's my big ol' bear hug of valentine for all of you.

Give somebody a hug today {{{{{{hughughug}}}}}}}

Booked

Good Morning!

It’s 8:30 and the driveway is clear of snow, breakfast has been eaten, papers have been read, and coffee is now being drunk.

Thank you Newt for tagging me on this Book MEME. It was fun and different.

Hardback, trade paperback, or mass-market paperback?
I really like the size of a trade paperback, so I usually do that. And I’m appalled at how much paperbacks cost these days!

Amazon or brick-and-mortar?
Oh, I would be lying if I said I didn’t partake of Amazon’s savings. But I would much rather go to a bookstore than order online. Buying books isn’t just about convenience; it’s an outing.

Barnes & Noble or Borders?
No preference, really. I go to the Borders because the Barnes and Noble is at the mall and I don’t want to mess with that traffic. Plus, that store is always packed and I get claustrophobic. The Borders closer to me is newer and not as crowded.

Bookmark or dogear?
Bookmark! I love bookmarks, actually. I’m always buying them when I see something really different. Of course, then I can’t find my bookmark, so I end up putting a receipt or something there as a bookmark.

Alphabetize by author, by title, or random?
Oh alright, alphabetized by author then title. I also organize them by genre: literature, poetry, criticism, fiction, mystery, horror, and everything else. Not every book in the house gets this treatment, but I have a bookcase that is considered “Kell’s Books.” Al has his own, too. Of course, a lot of my books are from college, and I should probably give them away—wait, that’s the next question.

Keep, throw away or sell?
I do give them away when I can stand to. I used to take them to Half-Price Books when I lived near one. I always tell myself I’m going to be brutal and really thin it out, but I usually end up giving away very few.

Keep dust jacket or toss it?
Keep it. If I actually buy a hardback, then I want the dust jacket.

Read with the dust jacket or remove it?
I always start out with the dust jacket because I use the inside flap as a bookmark a lot of the time (is that a bad thing? Am I ruining the integrity of the dust cover?). Eventually though, I get tired of fighting it and take it off.

Short story or novel?
Novels. I do enjoy short stories and think it takes a lot of talent to pull off a short story, but I’d rather read a novel.

Collection (short stories by same author) or anthology (short stories by different authors)?
Collection. It’s always interesting the different stories that one writer can come up with. Anthologies are usually half of people I’ve heard of and like and half that I don’t.

Harry Potter or Lemony Snicket?
Harry Potter. I never did read the Snicket books.

Stop reading when tired or at chapter breaks?
I want to be tired at chapter breaks.

"It was a dark and stormy night" or "Once upon a time"?
I’d probably head to the dark and stormy night more often.

Buy or borrow?
Borrow from the library. I like that I can try out a writer without the financial obligation. I want to buy; I used to buy a lot, then I started knitting and the money got a little diverted.

New or used?
I’m with Newt—either, as long as it’s in good condition and doesn’t smell.

Buying choice: book reviews, recommendations or browse?
All three, but book reviews less than the others—I’m talking about the Times reviews and things like that. I like blog reviews. Mom ☺

Tidy ending or cliffhanger?
Like 'em both, but I want it to follow through.

When do you read: morning, afternoon or night?
I don’t have a particular time, but I tend to read early in the morning or late at night. That’s when the house is really still and I can get lost in the story.

Standalone or series?
Both, but I don’t like getting into a series in the middle if I can help it.

Favorite book of which nobody else has heard?
Shepherdess by Joan Jarvis Ellison. It’s a memoir rather than a novel, and I really enjoyed it. But if you’re not into wool and sheep and things like that, you probably wouldn’t like it.

Favorite books read last year?
The Thirteenth Tale by Diane Setterfield
Booked to Die (and the others) by John Dunning
The Mercy of Thin Air by Ronlyn Domingue
(Hey! Those were on Newt's list!)

Favorite books of all time?
Possession by A.S. Byatt
A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens
To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
Dubliners by James Joyce

What Works For You

I want so much to be the free-spirited, hair-flying-back-while-driving-the-Jeep kind of woman. That person who can adjust so quickly to whatever life throws at her. The woman for whom life itself is the adventure, so enjoy and go with the flow.

But I’m just not. I need structure. I crave schedules and predictability. I need a sense of control in a world where I have none, and I want to try to achieve some contentment in the world I live in. Not that I’m really sure how to do that, but I need to give it a try.

The last few weeks have been hell. I didn’t know what to expect with this flare up and the steroids, and I should have been better informed. I’m desperate for my sense of normalcy back.

So, I’m thinking out loud here about how I might tweak things in my life to bring in some stability. And maybe along the way I’ll find my bliss, which I have a sneaky suspicion has been right in front of me the whole time.

The hardest thing about staying at home is the sense of “oh that can wait until tomorrow because I’m not doing anything then, either.” I need deadlines, and I have tried in the past to set up a calendar with personal deadlines, but it never worked. Considering the way I overdo lists and organizing things, I think I try to take on too much and schedule too tightly. I still need to set some deadlines, but they need to be realistic. And I need to get over my feelings of embarrassment and uselessness because I stay home.

I do better in the mornings, but I spend too much time with breakfast, the paper, the crossword puzzle, the internet, and other procrastination tools. So, I could get up an hour or more earlier. I’m not going to say I’ll workout every morning because I won’t. But I’m slowly getting back to that routine, too.

The blogs can be a source of stress. I spend too much time reading and too much time toiling over my own posts. I’m going to set a time limit for myself and not feel guilty if I don’t always comment. My blog feels chaotic to me, so I want to try some different ways to post and make it an outlet rather than a dumping ground. Maybe I’ll post first thing in the morning and comment on a current event. Or join in on some of those “list” blogs, like 13 for Thursday. Maybe I need prompts?

I think I’ll see what volunteer opportunities are around. I’ve done volunteering in the past and it hasn’t always been such a great experience. Like anything else, there’s a hierarchy and cliques. I’ve learned that it only works if there’s someone who trains and runs the volunteers and the work is consistent. But maybe getting out of myself would be a good idea.

There are lots of little things that need to be done in the house. Lots of things need to be cleaned out and put in order. That stuff is always there, so I need to tackle things one at a time, either a room at a time or a task at a time.

And I need to turn off the TV.

So, there we are. It’s a start, I guess. Just writing some things down has helped because it seems pretty doable. And after the last few weeks, I really need to be able “to do” again.

Taxing Situation

It used to be that we looked forward to the tax return as some fun money. Let’s go buy something electronic!

Then it became a way to pay off a credit card or pay off something electronic.

Then it became a political issue. We listened to all the blather by the conservative talk show hosts who went on about how stupid Americans were when they actually get a tax return because that means that they didn’t get the money they should have had in the first place. (This was during the Gore/Bush run and conservatives were on a “I work hard and I have earned the things I have, so why be ashamed of hard work and give my money to a liberal big government." Or something like that.) So we all changed our withholdings to increase the pay check, then was disappointed not to have the “free money” feeling of a tax return we could actually do something with.

Then it became something that would help pay off or maybe take us on a weekend trip.

Then we bought a house. And since we’ve been here over a year now, the tax return has become a moment of great anticipation again.

I don’t pretend to understand any of this. I’m blissfully ignorant and guide my reaction by Al’s reaction. But no electronics this time and no other big-ticket fun things like a motorcycle (poor Al). No, we must have hit the deductible because we had our carpenter dude (CD) come give us an estimate to update the master bath. Money from the house goes back into the house.

We had been talking about these changes for awhile, usually in a “I was thinking we would do this” and “Really? I was thinking we would do that.” For a hubby who says “Whatever you wanna do,” he sure has a lot of opinions when it comes to decorating.

This update started simple for me—the nasty strip of glamour globes has to go! That’s it. Take them away and this room will be 100% improved.

But, when those go, the new ones are going to look funny over the flat-slab of a mirror bolted to the wall, so how about putting single mirrors over the sinks, then the lights can be over those. Symmetry! Which of course means we’ll have to paint. Hmmm. Painting is going to spotlight how really nasty this vinyl floor is. We really should change that to tile because it’ll look so much better. Oh, and since we’re down there anyway, and a heated floor system would only be another $250, might as well add that in there. And since the gorgeous floor would look awful with that bright-white tile around the tub, we should just carry that tiling up there. Of course, now that we’ve done that, the white counter top and dated taps scream “What the hell? Did you run out of money? I stick out like a sore thumb here!”

And Ta Da! From changing a light fixture to whole new bathroom!

Al is doing a happy dance with thoughts of warm tippy toes and resale opportunities.

Have a great weekend, everyone.

Blather

My hubby sent me an email with the message “A knitting project I can handle.” Eagerly, I open the link to this:



Yes, they’re breasts. This is serious, though! A hospital in Liverpool is using them to teach breast feeding. They are a lot cheaper to make then buying a model, especially since they need something like 50. I think it would be a hoot. Maybe I can find the pattern somewhere.

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I’m taking control of the whole diet thing again. I signed up for a Winter Weigh Down sponsored at the base. It’s a competition thing with groups, but our group doesn’t seem to care about that—we just want help loosing weight and getting in better shape.

As is typical of the military, the program that they bought has now gone out of business, but we’re sticking with it. It’s a calorie-counting program, but instead it’s through portion size. So, my sample meal plan has how many servings of things I can have, equating that if I eat the proper portion, I’ll thereby eat the proper calories. So, my plan looks something like:

Breakfast:
1 Fruit
2 Breads or Starches
1 Milk or yogurt

Then I go to the Exchange List book, look up the ingredient, say Bread, and pick from this list, which says ¼ of a bagel is 1 serving or 2 slices of reduced-calorie bread, things like that. Then I have to write it down in my food diary because they take those up every 2 weeks and give us points for the good things we do and take points away for the bad.

We also have to keep track of fats; we get 40 grams a day.

It’s all very confusing and overwhelming right now and seems to be a lot more work than I want to do. But I’m stuck and haven’t lost any more weight since before Christmas, so I need a kick in the tush to get going again. And considering how good I felt while I was taking care of myself and how rotten I’ve felt this year while I wasn’t, I definitely need to take some control back.

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My mantra now is “I’m feeling better; I’m feeling better; I’m really feeling better.” And I am. I bought groceries and am cleaning the house is spurts. I can’t believe how much I’m enjoy cleaning. Things had just gotten so cluttered, which is usual for my house, but the clutter is hiding things that should have or need to be done, like paying the electric bill. It would be a good idea to pay the electric bill.

There is one side effect that seems to be hanging on, though, the irritability. Spittin’ nails, clinching jaw and fists, and a constant chewing on the inside of my lips kind of irritability. I’m trying to harness it. You know, sit still and breathe for a while, do some stretching exercises, knit, and drink herbal tea. I’m going to OD on chamomile tea! Actually the knitting is soothing because it’s so repetitive and flowing in a nice Zen-kind of way.

But here’s the problem, and this will give you yet another peak into the neurosis of a woman who we already agree should probably be in therapy. The more I try to calm down and clear my mind, the more stuff gets back in there that just upsets me again! And it’s stupid stuff, like hurtful things that some woman said to me 3 years ago. I realized that I was grumbling a response I wish I had said all those years ago as I was vacuuming. Or I’m thinking of something Al said and now it makes me mad and I wish I had said blah, blah, blah, blah, and he tries, but he just doesn’t understand, and nothing I ever do is good enough. Aarrrrrggghh! I know it’s irrational, but the feelings feel real, so it’s hard to just push them aside.

So, I’m going to finish up the cleaning downstairs, pay the bills, make yet another pot of tea, then sit back and enjoy my accomplishments for the day.

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BTW, we had maybe an inch of snow yesterday, but there was Al, blowin’ it away with our big-ass 6-speed, 2-reverse speeds snow blower *insert Tim Allen “ARR ARR ARR” grunts here*

When I Have To Stay Home

I don't want to. And when I have a lot of things to do, I just want to stay at home and veg.

I spent yesterday trying to be fairly still and sitting upright because I was still lightheaded and feeling just icky (only technical terms from now on). Except for that, I think I’m doing OK. But driving was out of the question, so I was stuck at home. Usually, not such a bad thing, but when you’re getting energy back you haven’t had in weeks, you don’t want to “have” to do anything you don’t want to do. But I decided to give the whole "rest" thing a try.

So, no quilting because I don't trust myself around sharp objects, and not much reading or computer typing because it's still takes more effort than I want to put into it. I can knit, though, because I'm making a simple shawl with one stitch. So, I did that and watched a lot of TV. I know, I have Netflix DVD sitting by the TV (Little Miss Sunshine), but that would have taken concentration. You know, there's not much to watch during the day. I leave it on HGTV or DIY, but some those crafty shows are a little out there. The only things that really stood out were a few commercials:

Eye Drops—The say, “a common side effect is a temporary burning sensation.” What? Oh, no. There is no temporary here. There will be no burning when eye drops are used.

Jon Bon Jovi—It’s for a new Kenneth Cole cologne for men. Jon is leisurely lounging on the floor, while an unplugged version of his song “Who Says You Can’t Go Home” plays in the background. I think this is the third outing for this song--one for Bon Jovi, one for the duet with Sugarland, and now this one. That’s a whole new type of recycling.

Cox Cable—The ad starts with a beautiful sunrise while the voice over talks about the rise of wonderful technology. Ain’t metaphors grand? Then the voice starts to talk about how great it will be with watching everything in HD, watching any time they want, even watching TV on their cellular phones. What? Wait. There are already enough idiots driving while talking on these tools of the devil, and now they can watch TV while driving? Can’t they just use Tivo and watch it later? Sometimes progress isn’t so good.

Dog Food—I love this ad. All the adorable dogs, with their ages and names flashing while they smile in the arms of their happy owners. Every dog is cute. I want a dog.

Birth Control—All this reminded me of an oldie but a goodie. Years ago, there was a commercial with a nice homemaker, her long blond hair wrapped up in a bun, standing in a nursery, her hand oh-so-casually resting on the back of a chair so that her big ol’ diamond rings can prove she’s married and not a fallen woman, and her husband is puttering around behind her. She looks at the camera and says, “After the baby, I didn’t want to go back on the pill.” No shit! It didn’t work too well for ya the fist time, did it? I think that was a diaphragm ad. And it was racy back then!

The other thing I did yesterday was sign on to an MS message board to ask if what I was going through with these steroids was normal. I don't usually lurk around those too much because there's so much horror, but the tone had changed a little since the last time I was there. I got replies instantly telling me to hang in there because I'm going to feel rotten, but it will be worth it. Seems there's this whole "You have to feel worse before you feel better" program with this course of steroids. That's the dumbest thing. You're going to feel better, but first you are going to be as miserable as these tiny tiny little tablets can make you. Hell, anything is better after that.

OK, enough of that. I'm getting the hell out of this house today. It's snowing, so maybe I'll take a little walk. Or go to the library and get some books on CD. Just anything.

Monday Musings

About a month from now, I will be winging my way to Scotland. I told myself I would wait to start a countdown when it was actually a month (7 Feb), but I’m just so damn excited! I’m trying not to practice pack and peak too soon. But I’ll have to think about it because shoes are such a major issue; ya gotta balance walkability with fashion. It’s not so easy. I have the knitting under control—I’m not taking everything. But I have to take something to work on and some easy patterns for when I fall in love with some gorgeous wool and just have to knit something. Hats for everyone!

And I, of course, reminded Al that he can buy as much scotch as he wants. He just has to remember we’re going to Italy in May, and how much he spends on whisky is how much I’m going to spend on shoes and/or purses. Fair is fair.

We’ll be there a couple of weeks, then my brother, Jay, will have to post something like:

Many of you have asked what has happened to Kell and why haven’t we heard from her. Well, she went primal. She threw on a tartan kilt and started calling herself “Warrior Lass” and was last seen running deep into the Highlands, clutching size 11 bamboo knitting needles in her hands and with strands of yarn mixed in her hair.

It could happen.

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I had my 6-month follow-up mammogram today. Six months ago I had my first one and since they didn’t have anything to compare it to and noticed some kind of A-typical doohickey, that the doc was 98% sure was just a think spot, wanted to look again in 6 months because if it was something that would grow, it would in that time. No growing. We will have no growing. My breast is fine, thank you.

But you know what really sucks? I have to do it again in 6 months! Both of them this time because it will get me back on a yearly schedule.

But I’ll think of that tomorrow (said with hand draped palm up over my forehead).

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I drove the truck today. That’s always an adventure. It was pretty fun, actually. Al had it tuned to a Classic Country station, which is really surprising. Usually, there’s nothing but Classic Rock in his car. But I just can’t stand to have on a Classic Rock station. At some point, during some night as I slept, a transmitter was beamed into my head so that some powerful being would know when I was in the car, listening to a Classic Rock station and would play nothing but “Sweet Home Alabama,” Rush, and the longest Led Zeppelin songs recorded. Every. Damn. Time. I don’t really have MS; it’s not a lesion, it’s a transmitter in my brain!

So, Classic Country was a nice change. Jim Reeves, Patsy Cline, Waylon, Willie. Not bad.

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And for your quik MS lesson for today, I’m going to try to type this without corrections because it is craking me upthe way my brain is jumping round and I’m leaving stuff out and mispelling words. Especially course the word sthat Microsoft usally corrects for me. There are cognitive MS symptoms but I’m thinking this is steroids my brain is kind of jumpi, jumpy. It is getting better though. I always type post in Word becasue I am a horrible speller. Now it's more important to do that.

I'm half way through sterod course now and am only taking 1 four times a day instead of 2 four time a day. the steroid or the combination of those and the other thoughsand pills I am taking are messing with my taste buds. Milk and many things taste sour. And I love mild. But chocolate and salt still tast good.

Whew! OK, that's enough. Back to Word! You wouldn't believe how long it takes me to do this. I have to read several times because some words just don't compute completely. But it's worth it in the end. I hope, anyway.

Hope everyone is having a good week.

Minneapolis, Motorcycles, and Mucho Fun

I know the weekend isn’t over yet, but it’s been so wonderful that I had to go ahead and talk about it now! We still have a Super Bowl party to go to, but that’s nothing compared to the fun I had yesterday.

We and 40 other crazy motorcycle riders boarded the bus to Minneapolis Motorcycle Show at 6:00 in the morning. It was so cold there was ice on the inside of the windows, but we were warm. Especially since I brought a blanket, which someone offered me $20 bucks for. Hahaha. No, my blankie.

After 2 stops and 6 ½ hours we were standing in the Convention Center, eating a corn dog and waiting to meet Newt of Newt’s Muse. I was so excited, and a little nervous, too, I’ll admit. I knew she was going to be as wonderful as her blog, but I hoped I wasn’t a disappointment. I really have to work on that confidence thing. Anyway, I knew her immediately.

You know how some people get all worked up about communicating online and how dangerous it can be because you never know if the person you’ll meet is like the person you read? Well, some people to need to chill out. Newt is exactly like her blog: beautiful, funny, colorful, warm, and full of love and energy.

And she is such a good sport. There aren’t many people who would come down to a motorcycle show in 2-degree weather to meet someone she’s only talked to through comments and emails. A show that was overwhelmingly overstimulating, to boot, with it’s blazing lights, shiny chrome, ear-piercing music, and the deafening roar of 3 motorcycles riding around in a giant round gerbil cage and just next door to that, others jumping off a ramp to do stunts in the air. Lordy! It was exhausting. But we followed Al around and talked about different things, when we could hear each other over the din, and watched Al sit a on a few bikes, trying on boots and helmets—he had such a good time. And the leather! There was lots of leather. Al found a leather thong for me, but I nixed that idea. I would wear the tank top with the flames on it, but a leather thong? That’s just not right.

After walking the whole show, we finally found tables and chairs, so Newt and I sat and chatted while Al went around again. Did I mention he had a good time? And he was having a terrible allergy attack, so it must have been fun; otherwise he wouldn’t have gone around again.

Did I mention that Newt is wonderful? And what a good time I had? And how cool it was to go up to a place I’ve never been, meet someone new, and just feel so good that your instinct were right on this time. I’m the kind of person who makes plans for things, then dreads it and stresses out, hoping I don’t end up saying or doing something really stupid, then when I get back, going over the whole event, trying to decide if I was OK. Did I babble to much? Was I boring? I’ll tell ya, with all those colors and lights of the show, and all the leather, and Newt’s natural bubbliness, I was feeling pretty plain vanilla. But I know that’s just me, so I didn’t let it bother me. Too much.

But I wasn’t stressed about this trip and I wasn’t dreading it; I was excited about it. And it turned out great. And I told her she should come down to Omaha, it’s an easy drive. And my hubby did the sweetest thing, he said, “Yeah, y’all come down any time. You’re welcome any time.” I just gave him a big hug before we got back on the bus because he’s usually so quite and reserve and doesn’t “warm up” very quickly. And he has no idea whose blogs I read because he doesn’t read any of them. Even mine!

So, all too soon it was time to head home. The bus was warm and movies were on. We watched Long Way Round, which is Ewan McGregor and Charlie Boorman’s trip around the world on BMW motorcycles. That’s a great documentary, by the way. They had some amazing adventures.

We’re back home, being heathens and sleeping in late, drinking coffee, and Al is blowing his nose, poor dear, because he’s still having allergy problems. And we’re talking about going back to Minnesota because we’d really like to see more of it from the outside of a bus. And there are a lot of bookstores, coffee shops, and yarn shops in Minneapolis/St. Paul. There's still a lot of fun to be had.

Oh, BTW. Have ya noticed that the steroids have kicked in? Yeah. Little hyper :-)

Little Bits

The editorial page has lost its sense of humor; Molly Ivins has passed away. Ivins was unapologetic about being a liberal,
"Even I felt sorry for Richard Nixon when he left; there's nothing you can do about being born liberal -- fish gotta swim and hearts gotta bleed,"

No one escaped her right-on wit. She was a force for free speech and free thinking and she'll be missed.

NPR has a good page on Ivins, with some of her editorials and interviews.

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The last *sniff* Harry Potter book will be out July 21. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows will answer all those questions we've wanted answered for these last, what has it been, almost 10 years? Of course it won't answer the most pressing question I have, "How the hell can all that creativity be in one person and why didn't I think of it?" The next movie (Order of the Phoenix) comes out July 13. It's going to be a summer of Potter. Cool!

Speaking of Potter, the publicity photos of Daniel Radcliffe for Equus have been released, and he's nekked! Granted, considering the play, this makes sense, but it's still a little odd. Boy, has he grown. You can see pics just about every where, but Mugglenet.com has some good quality photos, including this one, this one, and this one

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I have until June 17 to fly to NY and go to the "Radical lace & Subversive Knitting" exhibit at the Museum of Art and Design. You can read a review here--a review written by a knitter, not an art columnist. There's an exhibit on knitting done for charities that has a table with instructions and some projects already started for people to sit and knit. One of the ladies there was Naomi Dagen Bloom, who has a blog, is a well known knitter and brought a pamphlet about HIV in women over 60 and instructions for knitting a condum amulet. How cool is she?

Well, off to run errands before we head out to the Home and Garden Show. Guess it'll be another $4 hot dog for dinner again.

Finally!

Thanks everyone for the good thoughts and prayers.

The results of the MRI came back with good news! There are no lesions in my neck or spinal cord and the rest doesn't look too different than the fist MRI. A couple of more lesions, but no one's in a tizzy, so I guess it's ok.

I am going to do a round of steroids, though. The good news is that I don't have to go in for 3 days of steroids through an IV. Instead I'll be taking them for 10 days. I'm not sure how steroids help get over a relapse, but at this point I don't really care, either. Even though I definitely have trigeminal neuralgia, the doc thinks the flair up is because of the MS, so he wants to do the steroids first instead of putting me on the anti-seizure meds full time for the TN. At least, I think that's what's going on.

All I know for sure is that for the next 10 days I'm taking a huge amount of steroids. The nurse said the side effects could be an upset stomach, bloating and water gain, inability to sleep, and moodieness. Some would say, "And that would be different for you how?" And they'd be right ;-)

The best news though is that since I don't have to do the IV treatments and there's nothing else horribly wrong, I can go on the day trip to Minneapolis. Al and I are going with a riders' club to the motorcycle show up there. Al asked how many yarn stores he was going to have to go to to make this up to me. But I told him none, since I'm going to dump him and spend time with a blogging buddy. It should be a lot of fun. And 6 hours on a bus gives me lots of knitting time.

Sick Leave

Just wanted to let you guys know that you might not hear from me for a few days.

I haven’t been feeling too hot for the last week, but as usual, I just ignored it and tried to work through it. But the last couple of days have knocked me out. I’m having a lot of pain in my left cheek, so much so that I went to the dentist because I thought maybe it was a tooth problem and he could take care of it. He had good news and bad news for me—the good news was that he couldn’t find anything wrong and I didn’t need a root canal. The bad news was that he couldn’t find anything wrong and I didn’t need a root canal. So, I called the MS clinic and headed in for a check up.

Turns out I’m not crazy and I’m not just tired; I’m having a full-blown relapse of the MS. And it’s bad enough that they’ve ordered an MRI of my brain and neck for as soon as possible. The pain in my cheek is trigeminal neuralgia---a pain that runs down the trigeminal nerve of the cheek. If there aren’t any new/active lesions in the MRI, I’ll get a prescription for an anti-seizure medication to help with the pain. But since I’m noticeably weak on my left side and a little numb on the left side of my head, around my left ear, and neck, they are thinking that I may have some active lesions on the right side of my brain. If that’s the case, then I have to go through a round of steroids—3 days IV, 3 days oral. I’m not sure how the steroids help, but I guess they do. I was hoping not to have to get into steroids for a while, so I’m hoping for a pretty clean MRI.

So, I’m taking a break until we get this under control. It’s a pain (literally!), but it’s still not as bad as it could be. I’m optimistic that we’ll be pleasantly surprised by a relatively clean MRI.

Whew! I’m exhausted now. We’ll talk again soon.

The Art of Mending

I admit that one of the reasons I picked up The Art of Mending by Elizabeth Berg was the cover. It’s a comforting picture of a glass cabinet full of material. As someone who loves textiles, the combination of the title and the picture drew me in. I’ve also chosen wine by the label sometimes. And sometimes, this actually works!

I was hesitant about this book because I put Elizabeth Berg in the “Oprah Books” category. Her book Open House actually was an Oprah Book Club selection. And being the stubborn snob that I am, I always picked up Berg’s books then put them back down. But I’ve decided that I need to let go and try things I don’t think I’ll like. And it worked, because I really liked this book.

The story revolves around Laura, and it’s told from her point-of-view. You get to know her through flashbacks, descriptions of photos, and her own thoughts and actions. She and her husband and children go to her parents’ home for a family reunion. There, her younger sister tells her and their brother about horrible experiences with their mother. They are shocked and don’t know how to respond. Then something happens that forces them to face these allegations by searching their memories and listening to what their sister has to say. And then they have to decide what to do next to stay a family. It reminds me a little of Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood because of the time period and the mother/daughter relationships. The heart of the book is expressed best by the jacket copy: “…[Berg] confronts some of the deepest mysteries of life, as she explores how even the largest sins can be forgiven by the smallest gestures, and how grace can come to many through the trials of one.”

As to the title, it is the metaphor for the book. Laura says in the book that her family still makes fun of her love of all things domestic, but she doesn’t mind. She says, “As for mending, I think it’s good to take the time to fix something rather than throw it away…you’ll always notice the fabric scar, of course, but there’s an art to mending: If you’re careful, the repair can actually add to the beauty of the thing, because it is testimony to its worth.” This is said early in the book, and it’s not until you get further into the story that you realize that many things are worth mending.

Of course, I also enjoyed the descriptions of Laura’s quilting career—her trips to the fabric store, her love of fabrics, her workroom, how she stands in front of her design wall moving pieces around, and how she sees possible designs in things all around her. But that’s just me.

And just as a side note, I also got it as large print, and oh my gosh was it easy to read. I’m getting so old. It’s an easy, quick read anyway, but it was even quicker with large print.

Anyway, give it a try. Yes, I teared up several times during the book, and there were times I wasn’t sure if I liked Laura, but she definitely grows through the story. There are several memories in the story, where Laura relates a story from her childhood that has a correlation to what’s going on in her life now. I got a little tired of that but not enough to stop reading, but I did do a little skimming near the end because I just wanted to see what was going to happen.

So, have you read any good books lately?

Over 8 Inches

Of Snow! We had a snow storm, and the 3 to 6 inches turned out to be more like 5 to 8 inches. More like 8 at our place, except for the 2 feet at the bottom of the driveway courtesy of the snow plows, even though it was nice that they came so early on a Sunday morning.

We're exhausted. It took an hour and half to clear the driveway and sidewalk (actually, we didn't have to do one of the sidewalks because the guy behind us used his snow blower all the way down to the road--nice guy). It would have taken longer if it wasn't for the angel who came to visit us in the form of a nice old man in a truck, offering us the use of his snow blower. Seems he drove by and saw us struggling, so he went home and got his snow blower, then came on over. Amazing. Al had been wading through the pile of ice and snow at the end of the driveway while I was trying to push the snow off the driveway. We were pretty pooped by the time he showed up; he really was a life saver.

So, guess what we're going to do this afternoon? Yep. We're gonna buy a snow blower. Al doesn't care how much it costs, he's going to get the biggest damn snow blower he can find. It may never snow again, but by God, he'll have a snow blower just in case. That is, if we can find one. I would imagine there will be a run on them after this snowfall.

Anyway, here are some pictures for your enjoyment. Now that all the work is done, I'm ready to take a walk because it really is beautiful.

The house early this morning, before the shoveling began.




At the end of the driveway:


Poor mailbox:


A ballet of snow blowers:


A clean driveway!


The front walk and the piles of snow.

I Got Nothin' For Ya

I'm brain dead. I keep telling myself I'm going to try to post more often, but I just don't seem to get around to it. So, when my friend sent me this meme, I thought "Yeah! Soemthing to blog!" Actually I got a couple of these, all labeled, "Getting to know you in the new year." Like I'm very different this first month of 2007 than I was last year. I'm actually getting a little tired of these (horrors!). But, I got nothing, so I did this instead.

Oh, and Neil, I am so not tagging you on this ;-)

1. What time is it now? 5:38 pm

2. What color are your socks right now?
Kind of a khaki color—hiking socks. Although, I’m not hiking right now; they’re just really warm

3. What are you listening to right now?
Law and Order: SVU

4. What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?
Where am I? What time is it? What day is it? I have to pee.

5. Can you drive a stick shift?
Yes, I prefer a stick shift because I’m a control freak.

6. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?
Oh I hate picking out just one, but more than likely it would be some shade of green, like sage.

7. Last person you spoke to on the phone?
My friend T about the quilt group. That block-of-the-month quilt is never going to end.

8. Do you like the person who sent this to you?
Yes, she's a brilliant ESL teacher in CA

9. How old are you today?
This is just wrong! Why do these things always ask how old you are?

10. Favorite drink? With alcohol?
Hmmmmm. I really love bourbon and Coke. Without alcohol, it has to have caffeine—coffee, usually.

11. What is your favorite sport to watch?
Rally racing. I’m learning to cuss in several languages.

12. Do you like thunderstorms? Yes! Love them.

13. What's your favorite board game? I love board games! I like Scrabble, Sequence, Trivial Persuit, Yahtzee (is that a board game?), and on and on.

14. Do you like to drive fast? Not really. Maybe 5 or 10 miles over, but I'm pretty much a scardy cat.

15. Favorite food?
Besides chocolate? I crave Indian food.

16. What was the last movie you watched at the theater?
Oh, you’re testing my memory here. Um. I think it was Stranger Than Fiction.

17. Is the glass half-full or half-empty? Depends on the day, but usually half-full, I guess. But if it has a bourbon and Coke in it, it's empty!

18. What do you do to vent anger?
I’m a slammer—whatever door is unfortunate enough to be open and near me. Then I cry.

19. What was your favorite toy as a child?
I really liked my Baby Alive and my Chrissy doll—you could pull her hair out of the top of head and she’d have long hair! Oh, if only it was that easy in real life.

20. What is your favorite season?
Fall

21. Hugs or kisses?
Can’t I have both? I’d really like both, please.

22. Chocolate or Vanilla?
Can’t I have both? I’d really like both, please.

23. Cherries or Blueberry?
Can’t I have both? What’s with all this one or the other thing?

24. What are you reading right now?
Starting The Art of Mending by Elizabeth Berg and Misquoting Jesus by Bart D. Ehrman.

25. Favorite thing to do just for you?
I'm pretty crafty, what with the knitting, quilting, and scrapbooking, but just for me, I want to read.

26. Living arrangements?
Well, that’s a bit politically correct. Um, with a guy, in a house.

27. When was the last time you cried?
Yesterday, I was watching some hospital reality show and a little boy lost his arm. Why do I do that to myself? I will never let Al have control of the remote again!

28. What is on the floor of your closet?
Shoes, some dirty clothes, a sack of clothes I need to get rid of, a hangar I keep forgetting to pick up

29. What is your favorite TV show?
I’m not sure I have one. I’m terrible about knowing when something is on and remembering to watch it. But I try to remember to watch House and Monk.

30. What did you do last night?
Knitted a hat for a friend, listened to whatever was on TV, made a shepherd’s pie, updated my MS journal

31. Favorite smells?
Flour and butter before it’s turned into some pastry and bread baking. I also looooooove my “Rain” herbal soap.

32. What inspires you?
The families who keep going while their family members are in the desert. Good music with good lyrics.

33. What are you afraid of?
Way too much. But the latest fear is that the MS will progress quicker than I want. But that’s not going to happen. Actually, I’m planning on a full remission.

34. Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers?
Plain. I used to like everything on them, but I’d always end up taking everything off, so now I just cut out the middle man.

35. Favorite dog breed?
Petite Bassett Griffon Vendeen (that’s what Daily was), Spinone Italiano, Border Collie, Westies, just about anything!

36. Do you sleep with an animal? Are we speaking figuratively or literally? Not since Daily passed away :(

37. Number of keys on your key ring?
Well, I have 2 key rings. One with the key to my car, and one with keys to the house and the other cars. I don’t know why I have 2. At one time Al suggested something like it, but I don’t remember exactly what he suggested. Maybe just having the house on a separate key ring? Oh well.

38. How many times do you eat out in a week?
Once or twice

39. Favorite day of the week?
Fridays

40. How many states have you lived in?
7, so far (AR, CA, NY, LA, FL, OH, NE)

41. Favorite holiday?
Halloween and Thanksgiving

42. Ever driven a Motorcycle or heavy machinery?
No, but I’ll be riding a motorcycle when it warms up

43. Who is your favorite NFL team?
Whoever my brother tells me to cheer for. But I prefer college football.

44. Do you have a house phone that is NOT cordless?
They still make corded phones?

45. Prefer 10 inches of snow or 100 degree weather?
Ya worried me there for a minute. 10 inches of snow—I know I’m weird. But you don’t want to be around me in that kind of heat! I get cranky, before I zone out then have to take a nap.

Weekend Wrap-up

OK fellas, here’s a little tip for ya to keep peace and harmony in your relationship. When it’s
been snowing all day and you begrudgingly go outside to shovel but have only been out there for 20 minutes and shoveled only half the driveway, don’t come inside and say, “Boy, if you need some exercise, you can come out and help shovel.”

This is just wrong on so many levels. I ignored him at first. Then he said, “Honey?” and repeated the statement, this time even more jovial. He looked so pleadingly at me that I decided to help. And being the better person, I didn’t remind him that I did all the shoveling last year by myself because it always snowed while he was on shift. Hey, I know we had a mild winter, but snow is snow and shoveling is, well, shoveling. And let’s not even get into the whole implication that I NEED this exercise. He may not have meant it that way. And it doesn’t matter that I do need exercise, that’s not the point.

And here’s the kicker, it kept snowing, so there’s another few inches out there. But even though he’s supposed to have tomorrow off for MLK day, he’s going into work. So, guess who’ll have to shovel what’s left out there, including that thick pile of ice and snow that the plows left. Uh huh. I could wait until he got home, but I probably won’t. But I might call him and tell him to be sure to go to the gym since he wasn’t getting any exercise by shoveling.

Shoveling also shows another difference between us. I’m a little neater, for lack of a better word. For example, here’s Al’s side of the driveway during our last snow:



And here’s my side:




Before you talk about how much faster Al is, just know that as I got near the end and he was zooming to the sidewalks, he asked me to go back and clean up those lines.

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We went over to our friend’s house for pizza Friday night. They have two girls, but for some reason it had expanded to four. Seems 11 and 13-year-old do that—they clone on Friday nights in search of a slumber party. This family also has three dogs, two Great Danes and a chocolate Labrador, so it was a pretty full house. But we had a great time, and I got my dog fix. Here are a couple of pics of them:

Anya and Addie love the fireplace



Addie and Cocoa wait for a cookie



The girls were playing Dance Dance Revolution or DDR, that arcade game where you watch a screen and try to match the steps on the screen by stepping on the correct arrow. For some reason the girls just had to get me out there to play, too. Everyone wanted to play against Kell. Ya think that’s because I’m old and uncoordinated and they knew it would be an easy win? Yeah, me too. Actually, it was a lot of fun, and the girls had pity on me. Well, they had pity after I humiliated myself with the first song. So for the second song, they chose the “easy” one, the “slow” one, “Get Down Tonight” by KC and the Sunshine Band. Yeah! Now we’re talkin’! Bring it on, baby! And I did good, too. So good that they went back to a fast song next. Competition starts early, I see. All the songs sound like that Barbie song—“I’m a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world.” And I’ve learned, after watching the experts, that the key is not to worry so much about getting back to center. If you’re standing on the left arrow and a back arrow is coming up fast, you don’t have to go back to center and step back, you can leave your left foot on the left arrow and step back with your right. I tell you this so that when you are in this situation, you’ll be ahead of the game. Learn from my mistakes. Plus, if you’re a rather, um, womanly woman, with rather large womanly features, you might want to wear a jogging bra. Those “jump on two arrows at the same time” moments are a little tricky.

BTW, I’m sure Al is taking bids on showing the video he took of me. Oops, that got deleted! How did that happen?

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I went to a “Foundations” class at a local Yoga/Pilates studio. I’m so bored with my workout and I think I need something to help with balance and flexibility. This is the year of balance, remember. I was there for 3 friggin’ hours! I don’t even like to do something I really enjoy for 3 hours. It was interesting and I learned a lot, but by the last 30 minutes, I was getting cranky. That may have had something to do with the fact that I hadn’t eaten since 7:30 and it was now 2:00! Cranky, definitely cranky.

However, it was fascinating. I think I’m just going to do the Yoga for now. The Pilates classes are done on these machines called “The Reformer.” Doesn’t that sound a little intimidating? First of all, I keep hearing Arnold Schwarzenegger say it, but also I keep imagining some future world where people who wear color have to go through “The Reformer” and change into an army of grayness.

They do a lot at this studio—hypnotherapy, massage, Reiki and Ayurveda, a type of ancient Indian treatment that takes into account your “dosha”, or body type. If your dosha is out of balance, you have certain ailments, so if you know your dosha, supposedly you can focus on foods and exercise to obtain and maintain that balance. You can go here to find your dosha. I’m a Pitta, BTW, I think, with quite a bit of Kapha. There are parts of me that are all 3, but that’s the way all those test things work out for me. The questions always seem to be black and white—Are you this, this or that? Well, I’m a little bit of this and that. Anyway, it seems to be all the rage here.

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So that’s how my weekend went. How was yours?

Smile and Show Those Pearly Whites

We all hate it. We all dread it. And even the most testosterone-ridden man will admit to being afraid of going. But I had old cavities that had to be replaced, so I had to go to *pause for dramatic organ music* the dentist.

You almost have to sedate me to get me there. Well, maybe it’s not that bad, but could you? I mean, could someone just knock me the hell out and let me know when it’s over? Dentistry has come a very long way in my lifetime and it is pretty darn close to painless, but I remember the pain. I’m old enough to remember the “I’m sorry but this is just going to hurt a little bit” days. The “root canal takes at least 2 long visits” days. My heart’s beating faster just thinking about it.

I am a professional dental patient. Oh, I brush and I even floss the majority of the time, but I am paying for past sins. The kid and young adult who didn’t take such great care of her teeth and didn’t go to the dentist as often as she should have is suffering the effects.

Cavities don’t last forever, especially the silver fillings of old. They break or fall out, leaving a hole in the tooth that either has to be filled quickly, or as is more often the case, has to get a cap on it because there is already so much filling in that tooth, there’s not much tooth left to drill. And hoping against hope, it won’t need a root canal first, even though I know it will because I ignored any pain by trying to cover it up with aspirin.

2005-2006 was the worst dental year of my life. A root canal and three caps. I had so much dental work done that my insurance stopped paying—I maxed out my benefits. It was all fairly painless, but damn, that’s not the point. I should have just set a cot up in the back room of the dentist’s office. Caps take 2 visits, and the root canal was 3 (one to find out if I needed a root canal, one to do the root canal, and one afterwards to make sure everything was ok), plus a visit to refill the cap they had to drill through.

Isn’t it odd that we say an appointment with the dentist is a “visit.” As if we’re going to sit around the breakfast table, have a cup of coffee, and gossip about our neighbors or co-workers. Well, not with the dentist I saw during this time. He was an excellent dentist, but he had the bedside manner of a turnip.

But that’s not the case here. I found a wonderful dentist who seems really good at his job, plus he’s very nice. And his office is comfortable and the other people working there are very nice. I’m still a nervous wreck, but I don’t have to be sedated to go there.

I’m slowly having those old silver fillings replaced with this white stuff that’s supposed to be stronger and better and let me keep my teeth longer. The longer I can keep from getting another cap, the better.

So, that’s what I did yesterday. Can you believe that it took less than an hour to take out 2 fillings and refill them? I’m sure it took at least a whole day when I was a kid. Or at least, that’s the way it felt. There are TVs in all the cubicles, so I can watch the morning news if I want. As if I could focus on anything, let alone hear anything, besides that drill wailing like a siren in that giant echo chamber that is my mouth. But it’s a nice offer.

And my dentist is very nice. He’s always asking, “Are you doing OK?” But of course all I can say is “Uhrr Huuuaahhhhggg.” He just assumes that translates as “Yes, I am perfectly fine, thank you.” Not unlike a waitress who waits until your mouth is full before she comes by to ask if you need anything else; you don’t want to spew everything that’s in your cheeks just to say you could really use a glass of water.

I can’t tell him that the sound of that drill will echo in my sleep tonight. Or that the grinding tool he uses not only vibrates my head, but tickles my nose, making me pray that I don’t have to sneeze. And that the smell of that epoxy he packs into the tooth is worse than anything my hairdresser puts in my hair to cover the gray—and that stuff makes my eyes water. Or that as nice as his dental assistant is, every time he asks for a spray of water, I get a shower, and I hate water being sprayed on my face. And by the way, that bib you put on me? Can you loosen it a little because it keeps riding up across my neck.

But I made it through. He even said, “You did good, Kell.” What? What did I do besides lie there perfectly still and not scream and cry that I wanted my mommy? If a guy had a drill in your mouth, wouldn’t you lie still? Unless, of course, he said, “Is it safe?” *shiver* (that's a terrifying scene in Marathon Man btw.)

The right side of my mouth was numb all morning; it was close to 1:00 before I was back to normal. However, this morning, everything is back to normal. And I don’t go back until my next cleaning, which I think is April. So, that gives me over 3 months to recover/anticipate/gather up my courage for the next round.

Maybe I should get a prescription of Valium, just in case.

Whisky Potluck

The potluck is a party standard. Everybody brings something to share, so one person doesn’t have to do it all, and everyone gets to show off their specialty to the applause of others. It’s wonderful. Everyone is happy at a potluck.

So, who says a potluck only has to be food? For a first, we were invited to a Scotch Potluck Party. Everybody brings a bottle to share. Oh, there was gumbo and some food, but the whole point was the whisky.

A little background information for ya, first. The Dundee Dell is a great old bar here that has the largest collection of scotch outside of Scotland. I believe at last count they had over 700 different types of scotch. And once a month, they have a “Scotch Tasting” which we attend fairly regularly. I don’t partake because I drive. But I always have a good time, usually because of the other regulars, who know more about this stuff than anyone and are all pretty funny.

Every 3 years, these regulars go to Scotland for a distillery tour. They’ve gone so often that they have their own tour guide, Willy (how great is that, Simpson’s fans?), who sets everything up and drives the bus. They get real “behind the scenes” tours and some really nice bennies. And this year, we are going, too! I’m very excited about this. Besides the fact that we’ll be going to Islay then up into the Highlands and Edinburgh, it is great because I didn’t have to plan any of it. I just get on the bus. This will be awesome.

So, this potluck party originally started as a reunion party for the Scotland group. Since we’re going this year, we were invited to kneel at the shrine and partake of the life-giving liquid.

Reed’s house is in the Dundee area and is an old house that has had many different roles. Apartments, home, apartment within a home, and now a home. A warm, character-filled home with built in shelves, arched windows and original tile in the kitchen. But the focal point of the front room is definitely the liquor cabinet. It’s over 6 feet of rare single malts and souvenirs, including a Whisky Trivial game that is coming to Scotland with us.

Across from the cabinet was a bar-height slate table where everyone put their contributions. And oh my God, it was amazing. I don’t know all that much, but even I know that a 175th Anniversary Talisker is a huge deal. Al emailed my brother a list of what he could remember, so here’s what he remembers being there, with his short tasting note:

Littlemill 8 & 17 year old (an amazing lowland)
Linkwood 29 year old (great)
Glenmorangie Burgundy wood finish 12 year old (mine)
Glenmorangie 25 year old (not bad)
Edradour 25 year old (hot and spicy)
Balvenie 17 year old (finished in an Islay cask)
Ardbeg (finished in a sherry cask, interesting)
Talisker 175th Anniversary (amazing)
Something 35 year old (can't remember the name)
Some kind of rum (tasted like butterscotch)

Reed had tasting glasses for everyone. I settled for my one glass of wine for the evening because, as usual, I was going to be designated driver. And that brings up another good thing about this trip—I will never be designated driver. Anyway, it was like a bell rung and Al was off to the races. I didn’t see him most of the evening. As is usual for these little tête-à-têtes, I ended up talking to the other wives, listening to stories about the kids. But this time, these woman were going or had gone on this trip, so we had other stuff to talk about. Plus, Reed has a little slut-puppy dog who was just the cutest thing. She just loved being petted, so I spent quite awhile on the floor doing just that.

As the evening started to wind down and thin out a little, I ventured to join in and admire the liquor cabinet. That’s when the stories started, and I love stories. Every bottle has a story of how it was acquired. Al insisted that I try a Littlemill, a lowland scotch that was out of this world. It was very smooth—no alcohol shiver after the first sip. Just a nice, caramel taste with a warming sensation. And that lead to stories about past Scotland trips and what we have to look forward to this year.

I started watching Al pretty closely. I knew he had had too much because he kept repeating himself and he that little twinkle in his eyes. It’s that twinkle that comes at the peak of light-headedness and right before the crash. I started to maneuver us out by getting our coats, getting him a bottle of water, putting the glasses up. He was doing OK I thought, then they had to open that bottle of rum. He only had a sip, but that seemed to push him over the edge. I don’t remember the name of the rum but it was wonderful (I had a sip), but I do seem to remember hearing that it was made by some guy in his garage on some island. Ohhhhhkaaaaaaay. Time to go!

I finally got him out of the house, as another wife was trying to convince her husband it was time to go. We had to walk a couple of blocks to the car, and Al pretty much swayed his way there. He rambled a little about all the single malts that he had tried, saying “You’ll never see a collection like that again. Mo said it was at least $10,000 worth. You’ll never see a collection like that again.”

I got him home and into bed, finally. He valiantly tried to stay up while I filled my friend RJ in on the night (she decided to stay at the house and knit). I watched him as he slouched in the chair and his chin fell to his chest. I got him upstairs to bed, and he was out. He didn’t even notice when I came to bed later.

He was hurting the next morning. Not as bad as I expected because he did drink a lot of water throughout the night to stay hydrated. I told him that we were so concerned about working out at the gym to get in shape for this trip, but that’s not what we need to work on. Either he has to drink less and don’t try to keep up with those guys, or he better drink more to get ready. As tempting as whisky is for him, he said he had decided that drinking less was the way to go. Good choice.

The most important thing about this party, for me anyway, was that I had a good time with these people who I will be spending 10 whirlwind days in March. I think we’re going to have a blast in Scotland.

And Yet a Little More

Note: The Scotch Party post is still coming—I have to wait until Al gets home so he can tell me again what was there. I might remember the name, but I won’t remember the year, and that seems to be rather important. So, until then, here’s a little more holiday recap.


My friend RJ came in on Tuesday after Christmas, and I spent the next 4 days knitting, talking, crying and staying up until 2 am. It was wonderful. I didn’t realize how much I missed having a “hobby buddy,” somebody who has the same passion I do and doesn’t mind wallowing in it. I have a friend who is quilting the block-of-the-month quilt with me, but she’s a little more obsessed than passionate—there’s a difference, you know. Although some might call me obsessed, I am able to put projects down and leave them unfinished for awhile. I’m more obsessed about starting projects than I am about actually finishing them. Maybe that could be my new year’s resolution—to finish unfinished projects.

Anyway, RJ and I went to a workshop where we learned to knit a log cabin quilting block. It looks like this:



I’m not done yet, there are a few more sides to do. I really like this technique and think I’ll be doing it again after I finish the projects I’m working on right now. Also, she and I have decided to knit a scarf together. I mean, we’re each going to knit the squares for this scarf, then we’ll trade some of them so that our scarves will have a little bit of each of us in them. Cool, huh? Here’s a picture of what the scarf will look like when it’s done, I hope by next fall.



We’ve bought all the yarn (one of the local yarn shops in my town was having a 20% off year-end sale), so now we just have to start knitting. Knit 4 triangles, then sew them together to form the squares, then sew the squares together. All 32 squares. You can see why I’m saying I hope I’ll have it done by next fall. But it’ll be worth it. I’m also going to make a tote bag. What the hell, I have the yarn.

I was really sad when RJ left. And lonely. Al was home, but I didn’t realize how much I do by myself until she was here to do things with me. One of my other new year’s resolutions should be to get out among the living more often.

So, now the holidays are over and my friend is back in Austin. I have no more excuses. I have to get back to exercising and eating right and doing all the chores I’ve pretty much ignored for the last few weeks. Back to reality. But I’m not as depressed about that as I thought I’d be.

I feel hopeful for the next year. I have a lot to look forward to with our trips, so I have the incentive to get back to the gym and a better diet so I’ll be in good shape for all the walking I’m going to be doing. And I’ve had an energy boost when it comes to organizing some unorganized things in my life. I’ve created a journal for my MS so I can keep better track of how I’m feeling so that I can see if I have any triggers or if there is a pattern to any flair ups. I’ve also created a knitting journal so I can get all those projects I’m working on and want to work on organized. And hopefully this weekend, Al and I are going to sit down and do some honest talking about the year ahead: what kind of work we want to do on the house, what kind of repairs have to be done on the house, a more realistic look at our finances before and after the trips, and even looking further into the future and where we both want to be. I told him we should each work on a list of what we think needs to be done this year and what we’d like to do this year, then compare. I bet we’ll be surprised by what we consider priority and what we think needs to be done. I know that a BMW motorcycle is not on my list, and I’m pretty sure that a trip to Rhinebeck NY for the Wool festival isn’t on his.

Susan said that instead of new year’s resolutions, she’s having a theme for her year. Hers is Dare to Create. I like that! And after careful consideration of, oh, about 5 minutes or so, I think my new year’s theme will be “Balance and Content.” I spend an awful lot of time thinking, “I’ll be happy when I . . . “ instead of being content with the way things are. And balance? Well, I’ve felt pretty tilted all of 2006, so I’m going to even out and stay balanced this year. I’ll have to think on that one a little bit more.

OK, I’ve rambled enough for another day. I have more lists to work on! Have a great weekend every one.

Quick Holiday Recap

So, all those things that I said “I’ll do that after the holidays” have reared their ugly heads and are now waiting in line on my massive To Do list. Some are more important than others (balance checkbook and get more stamps), some are always on there (balance checkbook, laundry, exercise), and some are fun (buy yarn and work on travel plans). It’s 11:00 and here’s what I’ve accomplished: nothing. Nada. Not a damn thing. I’ve read the paper, I’ve eaten breakfast, I’ve read some blogs, and I’ve started typing up this post, but I haven’t done anything on my list yet.

This is my first day alone in the house again. It was nice having Al home for the holidays and I loved having my friend RJ visiting, but it’s nice to have the house to myself again so I can regroup. The beginning of a new year can be a reflective time, and now I have time to reflect.

It was a nice, lovely, quiet Christmas. We spent Christmas Eve with good friends, eating a fabulous meal and watching A Christmas Story. Al and I had a bit of a tiff but it didn’t last all that long (thus the description as “tiff”). ‘Tis the season for my nerves to be on edge, and unfortunately for Al, he’s the only one around for me to get mad at.

Christmas Day started with the traditional mimosas and breakfast then opening presents. We stuck to our plan of not going overboard this year, and I think we’ll stick with that. The gifts were much more heartfelt because we had to think a little harder about what the other person would want. I got Al The Road to Dakar book/DVD, which is about Charlie Boorman’s quest to race at Dakar. Boorman and Ewan McGregor rode around the world a couple of years ago in The Long Way Round. I watched the DVD with him, which at first I thought was part of his gift, but really, I love shows like that. They make me want to accomplish something that would scare me to death. But I’m not going to race in the desert—people die in that race. Anyway, he loved it. He gave me a Winnie-the-Pooh watch, a cookbook and a subscription to Hobby Farms magazine. Now, I know that last one might seem a little odd, but it’s really the sweetest gift of all. There are always articles about sheep, alpacas, goats, rabbits, and any other animal whose fur can be turned into yarn, and I have a pipedream about having a small farm. Al doesn’t really share that dream, yet he gets me this magazine because he knows how much I enjoy reading it. And speaking of thoughtful gifts, my mom and brother got me wonderful books, mostly knitting books, that I’ve been wanting for a long time. I can also get some yarn at my favorite yarn shop and some new tunes from iTunes.

New Year’s Eve was another quiet affair. It sleeted that morning, then snowed all day. I think we had around 3 inches, and the roads were really bad. The fireworks planned for downtown were postponed, and we pretty much just sat inside and relaxed. Al seems to take great pride in the fact that he doesn’t go out on new year’s eve, so even if it wasn’t snowing, we would have stayed home. He doesn’t even want to stay up to watch the festivities on TV. I tried to go to sleep but couldn’t, so I stayed up and finished my book.

We spent New Year’s Day at an annual party of one of Al’s co-workers. We really like this family and always have a good time at their house. Andi is a crafter and makes beautiful jewelry in addition to quilting and scrapbooking. Plus, she’s a great cook, so we always eat well. And Chris is a brewer, so there’s always good beer. I took my knitting because I knew that all the women would end up in the living room, sitting around the fire, talking. Except for a sleepy spell, I was able to keep up with all the conversations. And is usual for us, we were the last ones to leave. I don’t know how we always do that—it’s a little embarrassing, really. Actually, we left the same time another couple did, and while Al was putting on his shoes, he looked outside and saw them getting into their new Toyota FJ Cruiser. He jumped up and yelled, “Hey, don’t go yet, I wanna look at your car.” It’s freezing outside, but the wife and I stand there shivering and talking while Al sits in every seat and talks about the car. No, we are not getting an FJ Cruiser. I like not having car payments and sitting in that thing was like sitting in a tank. I couldn’t see over the hood very well. And I’m not that short! Besides, it really is more car than we need. We’re not planning on driving up a rocky mountain or through any rivers any time soon. Although that does sound like a lot of fun.

And that brings me back to sitting here, typing up a post when I should be doing a whole list of other things. Oh well. I guess I’ll stop there. I’ll ramble some more tomorrow. Next post, I'll tell ya about the scotch party we went to. Woo boy. I think Al is still hurting from that one.

Snow Day

North Winds Blow! It's finally snowing here!



My knitting buddy left yesterday and I'm sad. I'll post more later about what a great time we had, but in the meantime, here's a meme I was tagged to do before Christmas.

ABC MeMe - Tagged by Chelle!

The Letter A
Are you agnostic? I am not always a yes or no person, so here it goes. Honestly, there are times that I think I am. I have lots and lots of questions. I have faith, but then again, I’m not sure.
What is your age? Oh no you don’t! I’m young enough not to care if you know but old enough not to say it out loud.
What annoys you? People asking me how old I am.

The Letter B
Do you like bacon? Oh yeah! And that’s why I never have it in the house.
What is your birthday? April 26. Bet you thought I’d put the year, didn’t ya? I’m not that stupid.
Who is your best friend? A true friend wouldn’t rank her friends. But A, T, and RJ are way up there.

The Letter C
What is your favorite candy? I love a really good box of chocolates—not just creams and a combination of dark and milk chocolates.
Who is your crush? Hmmmm. Lately, Gerard Butler, Tony Curran. It’s easy to crush on an actor because there’s no chance you’ll meet him, so there’s no chance of making an ass of yourself.
When was the last time you cried? I am the biggest crybaby. And with it being Christmas, I’m pretty much a waterfall with every sappy commercial.

The Letter D
Do you daydream? To the detriment of getting anything else done.
What is your favorite kind of dog? I love most dogs. My darling Daily Dog was a Petite Bassett Griffon Vendeen (PBGV), but I also love boarder collies and Scottish Deerhounds.
What day of the week is it? Sunday.

The Letter E
How do you like your eggs? I love eggs! Any way you cook ‘em, I’ll eat ‘em. I will eat them in a boat and I will eat them with a goat . . .
Have you ever been in the emergency room? Yes, but not for me.
What’s the easiest thing to ever do? Smile

The Letter F
Have you ever flown in a plane? Yes. I love to fly.
Do you use fly swatters? Well, yeah. How else will I destroy those evil little critters that like to dive bomb me while I’m trying to read or take a nap?
Have you ever used a foghorn? No, but my hubby wants to put one on the Miata. And may I say, that I was a little concerned about what question would come with “F” but it’s all good.

The Letter G
Do you chew gum? Yes, and I can even walk while I chew it.
Are you a giver or taker? Oh, we’re all both, aren’t we? There are times I take, there are times I give. I’m multifaceted that way.

The Letter H
How are you? Fine, and you?
What’s your height? 5’6” but I wish I was at least 5’8” because then I’d be the perfect weight.
What color is your hair? Right now, it’s dark brown with reddish tones. I have no idea what color it really is.

The Letter I
What is your favorite ice-cream? Cherry Garcia and Chocolate and Peanut Butter
Have you ever ice-skated? Yes, when I was a little kid. I’d like to go again, but I seem to be the only one in my little group who does. Party poopers.
Do you play an instrument? I used to play the guitar. I’ve thought about picking it up again but I don’t have those calluses any more. Or the energy to practice. Or the talent, come to think of it.

The Letter J
What is your favorite jelly bean? I like jelly beans, ok, but one too many and I’m sick to my stomach the rest of the day.
Do you wear jewelry? I would if I had some. We saw a commercial for a Kay’s Jewelers and I said, “Diamonds are always a nice gift.” Al said, “That’s not you.” I said, “Yes, it is. You just don’t buy me that.”
Have you heard a really hilarious joke? Ok, I love this one. Angus walks into the Highland bar and orders a double whisky and to keep them coming. The bartender asked him what was wrong, and he said (in Scottish accent) “Ya see that bridge? I built that bridge with me own two hands. That bridge will stand for a hundred years. But does anyone call me Angus the Bridge-builder? No. Ya see that church? I built that church with me own two hands. That church will stand for a hundred years. But does anyone call me Angus the Church-builder? No. Ya see that house? I built that house with me own two hands. That house will stand for a hundred years. But does anyone call me Angus the House-builder? No. But ya f*#k one goat!”

The Letter K
Who do you want to kill? That’s awful! Ya coulda asked “Who do you want to kiss?” Wouldn’t that be nicer?
Do you want kids? No. Sure I seem nice and friendly and all that, but I’m really very selfish, neurotic, and set in my ways. I’d be a horrible mother.
Where did you have kindergarten? I think it was in Harrison, AR. But I don’t remember much about it. Mom says that I always wore a dress because I thought I’d turn into a boy if I wore pants.

The Letter L
Are you laid-back? No, not particularly. I’m a lot better than I used to be, but I’m still pretty tightly wound.
Do you lie? I’d be lying if I said no.
Do you love anyone? It’s all about the love, baby.

The Letter M
What is your favorite movie? I don’t have just one favorite. I like a lot of different kinds of movies, but I’m not a big romantic comedy fan or a slasher-movie fan.
Do you still watch Disney movies? Of course I do. I’m very comfortable with my inner child.
Do you like mangos? Mmmmmm, mangos. Especially in Mango Lassies (like a mango slushy at Indian restaurants)

The Letter N
Do you have a nickname? Kell is my nickname, if you can call it that. I’ve never had a cute nickname. Poor little nicknameless me.
What is your favorite number? I really like the number 3. There’s something really balanced about 3. I always chose 3 and/or 33 on lottery numbers. Of course, I never win . . . maybe I should find another favorite number.
Do you prefer night or day? “You know the night time darling (night and day)/Is the right time (night and day) . . .” Anyone know that song?

The Letter O
What is your one wish? World peace. Wait, I’m not in the running for Miss America! I wish for a puppy. OK, actually, I wish for joy, great heart-filling joy.
Are you an only child? Nope, a younger brother. But you already knew that, probably.
Do you wish this year was over? No because then there’s that whole “what did you accomplish this year” and “what are your goals for next year” and I can’t handle the pressure!

The Letter P
What is one fear that you are most paranoid about? Breaking down on the side of the road.
What personality trait would you look for in someone you wanted to date? Funny and fun-loving. If I was going to have to date again (God forbid), I would want someone I can have fun with. And have a lot of money (kidding!).

The Letter Q
Are you quick to judge people? Yes, and many, many times I’m not wrong. However, I’m becoming more apathetic as I get older, so I don’t care enough to judge.

The Letter R
Do you think you are always right? My hubby thinks I am, that’s what’s kept us together for so long. He’s always saying, *as Eyore* “Kell’s always right.” Of course, I’m not. And he doesn’t really think that.
Do you watch reality T.V.? I’ve watched Project Runway through the whole season, but that’s it. *she says smugly*
What is a good reason to cry? If someone takes your toy.

The Letter S
Do you prefer sun or rain? I love rainy, stormy days. We moved from Shreveport, LA to Pensacola, FL, to San Antonio, TX and I said to Al, “You keep moving me closer to the sun! I don’t want to be closer to the sun!”
Do you like snow? I love snow. Don’t like driving in it so much, but I love snow.

The Letter T
What time is it? 1:30 pm
What time did you wake up? 7:00 am but didn’t actually get up until closer to 8:00.
When was the last time you slept in a tent? 1991 or so when we went camping with friends in northern California. I’m too old to sleep on the ground now.

The Letter U
Are you wearing underwear? Is this an obscene phone call? Yes, I am. Victoria’s Secret. And you can use your imagination for the rest.

The Letter V
What is the worst veggie? Brussel sprouts
Where do you want to go on vacation? Dog-sledding in Alaska
What was your last family vacation together? Mom and I went to England and Scotland.

The Letter W
What is your worst habit? Too many to name, but probably procrastination. I prefer to call it procrastination than laziness.
Where do you live? In my happy place.

The Letter X
Have you ever had an X-ray? Yes. I don’t think that sets me apart from anyone.
Have you ever seen the X-Games? I don’t even know what that is.
Do you own a xylophone? No. But I had one of those little, colorful ones when I was a kid.

The Letter Y
Do you like the color yellow? Yes. My house is a lovely shade of buttery, light yellow. It’s a happy color.
What year were you born in? Oh no you don’t! I’m not stupid! You can figure out my age if I give you that. Ha! Thought you could trick me, didn’t ya.
What do you yearn for most? Yearn? Hmmmm. Yearn. I yearn for contentment and joy.

The Letter Z
What is your Zodiac Sign? Taurus
Do you believe in the Zodiac? Well, there are some pretty interesting coincidences if it isn’t real. I don’t believe in my horoscope, but some of those Zodiac descriptions are pretty close.
What is your favorite zoo animal? The big cats

Still On Holiday

'Tis Herself will be continuing her holiday break this week while she entertains and is entertained by her good friend and knitting buddy RJ.

Have a wonderful week and a Hap-Hap-Happy New Year!

Merry Merry

This is a really, really easy fudge recipe. It's pretty much foolproof--I swear!

1 1/2 cup sugar
1 (6oz) can evaporated milk
1/2 cup butter
1/4 teaspoon salt
3 cup mini marshmallows
1/4 cup water
12 oz chocolate chips (I use a combination of bittersweet or dark chocolate and semi-sweet chocolate chips)

Prepare a 9X13 pan. Spray it with nonstick spray. Line with a sheet of wax or parchment paper and spray that, too.

Combine sugar, milk, butter, and salt over medium heat. Bring to a boil, stirring constantly. Once it comes to a boil, cook for 5 minutes until thickened, stirring constantly with a whisk. Add marshmallows and water, and stir to melt (switch to a spoon). Remove from heat and stir in chocolate. Pour into prepared pan. Chill 3 hours or until firm. After you take it out of the fridge, let it warm up a little, then you'll be able to take out the fudge, with the paper. Cut into squares and serve at room temperature.

And now I think it's time for a Christmas break. So, warm, fuzzy thoughts for all of you this holiday season. I'll be talkin' to ya soon.

Ho Ho Hum

Jay tagged me with a book MEME, so I’ll start with that.

Rules for this tag game are:
-Grab the closest book to you
-Open Page 123
-Scroll down to the 5th sentence
-Post the next 3 sentences on your blog
-Name the book and author

I’m not going to tag anyone, though. If you need quick blogfodder, though, jump on in!

“This will be much better than Arkansas,” Felicia said.
“Why’d you leave Arkansas?” I asked, because I just couldn’t help it. Felecia was the simplest vampire I’d ever met.

Defintely Dead by Charlaine Harris.

How weird is that the sentences are about leaving Arkansas. Life is just freaky some times.

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I haven’t noticed a headline telling us that Lindsey Lohan hasn’t had a drink for 2 weeks now. Whatever will we do without our “Lohan Update”?

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It’s a cold, rainy day today. No snow yet, to my hubby’s joy. The temperatures have been unusually warm this winter. I’m not sure how I feel about that.

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My knitting buddy RJ is coming up on the 26th. I’m so excited! We’re going to a knitting workshop at my LYS (local yarn shop) and just going to hang out for a while. She’s had a very rough year and she needs some time to just chill. Al is planning on just sitting down in the pub and letting us yakety-yak all we want. He wonders how we can always have something to talk about. I’m not really sure how we do it, either. It’s the same thing with my friend, A. Talk, talk, talk. And more talking, still.

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I’m still reading my vampire/detective/romance book. I had to take a break while I finished off some Christmas stuff, but now I’m back into it. Tell me something, why do feel so guilty just sitting and reading a book. See? Notice how I said “just sitting . . .”? I feel like I should be doing something more productive—I think of all the things that need to be cleaned and groceries that need to be bought and a gym membership that should be utilized. I don’t feel guilty if I sit and knit all day, but then, I knit for other people. Sure, I enjoy it, but I give away almost everything I knit. Reading seems very self-indulgent. I wonder if I’d feel the same if I was reading, say, a biography or the latest political/historical tome. Then I could feel all superior because I was reading something “intellectual” or “worthy.”

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Within another year, my hubby will either be accepting another assignment or getting out of the military. I’m a bit panicky about either one. Staying in for at least one more assignment would be a little less stressful because I’m used to that. I enjoy moving around and living in new places. If he gets out, well, that’s a little more uncertain. He could probably get a job here and we could settle here for awhile. I say “awhile” because as much as I like it here, I’m not so sure I like it enough to stay here for the rest of our lives. Not that it would have to be that way, but I think my hubby is ready to settle down some where. But the scariest thing about his retiring is that I’m not sure we have the same idea about where and what we want to do. And although we’ve financially been planning and thinking about it, it doesn’t seem like we’ve been planning and thinking enough. I’ve always just followed along, and now I might actually have a choice. What the hell do I do with a choice?

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I took the nerd test on Cynnie’s blog. *Sigh* It’s so typical.



“Not nerdy, but definitely not hip” That’s me—friggin’ middle of the road.

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The temperature has finally dropped back into the 30s, so I’m making chili tonight. Might light a fire in the fireplace. Maybe watch a Christmas movie. Snuggle on the couch with my sweetie. Hey! I may even read some of my book!